She lapped me twice yesterday. Twice. She an avid marathon runner. Me an avid “hope I get through this jaunt without tripping on a rock” walker. My lap around the neighborhood is about a mile in lengt
h. Her lap a bit further than mine. We made our cursory nods at one another the first time she passed me. She’s not much of a talker. Running is serious business for this gal. But when I heard her steps encroaching upon my territory the second go around, I decided to break our customary silence.
“I’m going to ‘facebook’ that you lapped me twice today! I used to run, but I can’t anymore. I’ve been through cancer, and it’s slow
ed my pace. You’re my inspiration!”
It was then that she did something I’ve never seen her do before. She stopped running (she was now several paces ahead of me), turned around and said…
“No, you’re my inspiration. Look at you. You’re jogging slowly. Someday we’ll run together.”
I nodded my thanks, and we departed company. It’s highly unlikely that I will ever be able to keep pace with her stride, but I liked her idea—this “running together.” It started me thinking about the men and women with whom I currently keep pace. Those who are stepping the path of cancer and who are moving forward with their healing. There are many of us. Too many to name in one post. Another 1.5 million will be added to the roll call this year alone.
And while I may not be able to run with the marathon momma in our neighborhood, I’ve been privileged to run with many valiant cancer-warriors in the course of my last year. Some of them I was able to meet face-to-face this weekend.
All of us cancer survivors. Three of us breast cancer survivors. One a momma-survivor—her precious son, Andrew, marking the path home to heaven increasing our hopeful expectation for what awaits us all at the end of the road. I am honored to call these women friends; they have stood with me, prayed for me, touched me with their love—all from a distance, and just this past weekend, in the flesh. As I recently wrote in my book proposal…
“Suffering need, needs a suffering friend. Not just any friend, but a friend who has walked a similar road.”
Certainly, we need a variety of friendships. But there is something uniquely special about having a “come-alongside” friend who grasps the fullness of our pain, whether that pain issues forth from cancer or from some other type of “disease” that is eating away at our flesh. We need those who will keep pace with our stride, not move ahead of us or lag behind but who willingly enter into our struggles because their stories mirror ours. Out of the comfort we have known we must, in turn, offer comforting comfort to others (see 2 Cor. 1:3-5).
I don’t know what that will look like for you in the days to come, but I imagine there will surface a person in the next week who will need the benefit of your comfort. Perhaps a “suffering need” with which you are well familiar. Promises regarding a “future run together” fall flat to a heart that is suffering. What proffers hope is an offer of willing participation, a decision to stop running ahead and to start keeping pace with personal pain. A slowing down so that the hurting heart might catch up, look up, live up in the midst of trial.
God needs you to minister his comfort to his children. You cannot be all things to all people, but you can be a friend to one. Would you be willing to pay attention to the lives that cross your path today? There is someone who needs the tenderness and kindness of heaven. God has entrusted you with the privilege of this glorious dispensation. Suffering need, needs a suffering friend. Out of the comfort you have known, minister comfort. As always…
Peace for the journey,
~elaine
PS: According to random.org, the winner of Glynnis Whitwer’s I Used to Be So Organized is Kathy S. And because my friend, Cindy, is the queen of organization and simplicity, I’m sending her a copy as well. Leave a comment today to be entered into a give-away for Michael O’Brien’s CD Be Still My Soul.
I don't want the CD but do want to say that you touched my heart at She Speaks and through your words – the words He gives you in a way that brings peace and comfort to all the pain I have self-inflicted in walking my path instead of His and all the pain from the world…your message transcends the disease… Love 2 you
"Willing participation"….yes mam, that is my hearts cry as I seek to hear Him and serve Him daily.
Living in His embrace today~Pamela
you run with a very special crowd, and i am
so happy you seem to be well.
keep up the race and thank you for the
inspiration.
Not sure why but I'm sitting here bawling after reading the post…
Elaine,
So beautiful! You surely didn't choose cancer, but God has been glorified through your struggles. And now you generously share your pains, wisdom and comfort with so many who are confused, scared and hurting. Is there a greater gift you (or any of us) can offer to others? Cancer sucks, but you are doing amazing things because of it. It will not have the last word!
I haven't had a chance to read about your She Speaks experiences, but definitely want to catch up on it all.
Love and prayers,
Kelli
So glad that you were able to connect with these sweet sisters. I have been rather green with envy of all the pics from fellow bloggers who have met each other at She Speaks. When I went 3 years ago, I didn't know what I was doing…didn't have a blog…didn't know anyone. It was a rather lonely process…hoping that I can connect next year and meet some bloggy friends.
God's grace to you my friend.
Denise
It's always a Blessing when someone pauses and reaches out to provide inspiration and encouragement Elaine… As you've done for so many others.
🙂
Have a Blessed Day!
Elaine, too bad I didn't make it to the I Used to Be So Organized book (I'm still recovering from a crippling disease called perfectionism), but I hope I make it to the O'Brien CD. Sounds like a good one, for you to offer it as a give away.
But truth be said, I never comment for the giveaway per se… I'm sure you know that by now. This post just gripped my heart… no, tore it to shreds.
I know the story of Melanie as well, I have read of the pain and agony she went through when Andrew went home to heaven. Cried many tears reading her posts.
And I certainly know your story.
That runner you spoke of was very kind, but I know she was not just flattering. She was a God sent messenger of God to inspire you, and us, because you were able to write about it.
We do need a real friend, a come alongside you kind of friend, one who will adjust her pace, slow down a bit, just so she be with you where you are, and yet at times maintain her pace, just so you will run a bit faster, and enable you to meet her where she is!
How awesome this post it. Praise God for the fresh inspiration He is pouring into you.
Much love
Lidj
Yes! I "can be a friend to one". In THIS case, it's clearly not necessary to "lap" anyone! Simply "run with".
Thanks for the soul-stimulus today.
Elaine, this was so very inspirational. There have been many health issues in my family lately. Some of the unresolved ones still have the potential to be quite serious. I take such courage from the words you speak, and for the way you have walked your cancer journey. You are a "come alongside" friend in Blog Land who helps me stand a little stronger. Thank you for that…
I will pass the comfort on.
GOD BLESS!
I swear you're a walking (running) sponge when it comes to God's life-lessons. You took that seeming innocuous event and turned it into a devotional. How like you.
So proud to run alongside you!
God is sooo serious about this comfort others with the comfort that you have received thingy. I've seen it in action so many times. I've done it, received it, prayed it. We have the ability to do and be something that the angels cannot…..an empathetic friend.
"Suffering need needs a suffering friend.". Oh Elaine, again you have nailed it with this truth. I'm so thankful for the times you have encouraged my heart over the past 3 months especially since hearing my diagnosis. Although other friends are so kind, they can't understand and identify the way that you do. We speak a different dialect now…a foreign language to many, yet still unfortunately all too common at the same time. To know you simply understand without explanation or information…thank you. A kindred spirit on this cancer walk. Thank you for the times you have stopped to encourage me. You are my inspiration too. Love you friend. Wish I had been at the conference to hug all your necks. Oh you have no idea.
Thanks for "running" beside me and waiting patiently on the days when the race seems so hard,
Hugs,
Joy
Hi Elaine! For some reason it has been awhile since I stopped by…don't know why because you are such an inspiration in your words….
Blessings to you!
~Beth
I love everything about what you have written here.
I believe and say that it takes a lot of courage to be with someone who is suffering, who is grieving.
I am grateful that I have a few courageous friends.
I like the idea of being a friend to only one. It's less intimidating and far more powerful than trying to reach the mass. Great post.
Blessings!
Beautiful–each one of you. Yes, He made us to desire the companion along the way . Not everyone is strong enough to hold up others, though. You are such an inspiration, Faith Elaine. Love to you, lady. I'm getting out the poster board…:)
Such a beautiful post. Food for thought. You run at a pace God has for you at this moment and you run it well. Keep it up and thank you for sharing your heart with us.
Elaine,
This was so beautiful, the penning of your heart. I love that this lady stopped to share her thoughts with you, as you shared yours with her. God is good, and in my mind's eye, I can see you running again, soon!
Until then,
Yolanda
You DO have a way with words… a way that hits the heart of each one of us. I can picture you on the walk and the runner pausing to say what she did, and there isn't a doubt in my mind… you WILL run together one day!
I love the picture, some of my favorite bloggers. What a week Elaine, and what an inspiration you are to me.
xo
Hi Elaine! I haven't been getting around to blogs much lately, but wanted to make a quick visit while I have a few moments.
Thank you for another encouraging post…. have a wonderful day!
wifeforthejourney:
Over the course of the last year in our new home, I cannot count the times that we have marveled our neighborhood marathon runner. We joke about how she seems to seek the most uncomfortable weather conditions possible, heat, cold, rain – if its nasty she is good to go. She is truely in a perpetual state of training for her next big race and her endurance along is remarkable. What a turn of events to see that she seems to hold the same opinion of you?
Through the worst days of cancer treatment, your passion to keep going has been an encouragement to us all. Thanks for letting us tag along with your own amazing pace!
Love,
Billy
You ALWAYS inspire me to want to do more than I am doing! Were I in your shoes I'm afraid I would not be as upbeat and trying so hard. I love how you minister to those around you even when you are bruised and battered. You're one of my heroes Elaine!!!!
Love you~
Marilyn…in Mississippi
I think your runner friend was right. You are an inspiration! What a beautiful post that we all need to take to heart.
I loved this post. The conversation was very real and INSPIRED me. Thanks for sharing.