*Note: update on winners below.
“You can make that choice, daughter. But in doing so, realize that you don’t travel this road unaccompanied. You travel it with me and with my knowing.”
And with that brief exchange, I am undone, as I remember my grace and just exactly what price was paid for its rightful place in history. No dream or action rendered accordingly is worth the blood that was shed on my behalf.
Dreams.
They are our occasional portion. We don’t ask for them. They simply find us. Dreams give us some limited permission to flesh out the unspoken seedings of our heart. For good or for ill, dreams allow us walks down roads we might not otherwise journey. Roads that are sometimes welcome; roads that are sometimes better left untraveled.
The latter has been my swallow this morning. In the moment and as it played itself out on the stage of my unconsciousness, it tasted sweet. But unconsciousness quickly turned to conscious awareness, and with that discovery, I had a choice to make—
To nurse the dream with thoughts of action or to surrender its hold to the cross of Jesus. And while others might voice their “let it go” and “it’s just a dream”…
I know better. What surfaces in the night can quickly become the sin that plagues the heart and the mind during the day. Better to surrender quickly. To confess and to allow grace its rightful place in my heart. Hardly seems fair; after all, I didn’t go to bed asking for a forgotten desire to rouse from its designated grave and to sing her song onto the stage of my thoughts. I went to bed with Jesus on my mind and with his song in my heart.
An odd coupling—Jesus and my sin. But then again, maybe not. Maybe just exactly as this life was meant to walk. My sin … his notice.
Why do I tell you this? Why do I cloak myself with a brilliantly bright computer screen in this dark hour to pen my confession?
In part, because confession is good for the soul. Bringing a night’s pause into the light diffuses the mystery of sin’s grip.
In greater part, because I want you to realize that for all of the ways that my life breathes with the witness and understanding of Jesus Christ, there remains a thorn of sorts. A portion of selfish flesh that continues to work itself out in me. Sometimes great. Sometimes small, but nevertheless still present. Still nagging. Still requiring my surrender and my increasing thankfulness for God’s grace that simply covereth.
I imagine that these fleshly thorns of mine will continue their prick. For as long as I tarry in this frame, there remains a tension between my earthly cloaking and my heavenly one. Remember God’s Plow and My Longing?
But in this moment, in this hour as the sun begins its approach to my soul, the thorn pricks less … bleeds less and reminds me that the battle hasn’t been lost in the night. It began there, but it finishes with the reminder of a sun’s illumination—a Son’s Light—and I am forever grateful for another day to be a better person.
To make better choices and to grow in my faith and understanding of all things sacred.
I don’t know how this strikes you today. I don’t know if anyone needs the witness of my penned confession. But if my feelings serve me correctly (for there are many occasions when they serve me incorrectly and to my contrary…), I imagine that there is some worth in bringing their voice to paper. Thus, I offer my heart and my pen and ask God to use them both as only he can.
For his glory. For his gain. For his grace that bled and shed its portion so that we could rise above our flesh and walk in victory over our sin.
It’s a good day to walk with Jesus, friends. I don’t know how your agenda reads, but I plan on squeezing in a lot of Christmas preparations around my thoughts of him.
An odd coupling—Christmas preparation and Jesus. But then again, maybe not. Maybe just exactly as this life was meant to walk. My preparation … his arrival. Thus I pray,
Come, Lord Jesus, and illuminate my heart with the truth of your grace. Thank you for a night’s pause and for the witness of your cross even there … in the midst of my dreaming and my thinking that sin cannot find me. It did, but so did you, and I am humbled by your willingness to meet me and challenge me with the higher road. In this moment, I choose better. When the next moment arrives, prick my heart with the same awareness of my “now” so that my path walks higher and greater and beyond where I am today. Thank you for Calvary. Thank you for Christmas. Grace and Expectation. An extraordinary gift to me in this morning. Amen.
~elaine
Dear One,
Your confession makes me want to lean into you and hug your neck. We are only human after all. Dreams can be powerful reminders of many things. I love how you use yours to refocus on Him. You always do, Faith Elaine…use all things to point to him.
Thank you for your prayers, they are much felt and appreciated.
Good for you Elaine; off for your morning run!
There are issues in my life that seem to emerge again and again. I think I’ve dealt with these things at the foot of the Cross but then something happens and I struggle with worry. I pray and ask the Lord for direction and guidance and trust that He will. But when I hear silence, I tend to revert back to worry. To me this means I’m not trusting His perfect timing. And I know He is trustworthy. I want to grow in my faith and not waver because I don’t see answers.
I’m doing a Bible study by Jennifer Rothschild called “Walking by Faith: Lessons Learned in the Dark”. It’s excellent, especially for me at this particular time. Jennifer is blind and she’s got so much to teach from her personal experience.
Thanks Elaine for your timely post. As you can read, you’re not alone in your struggle. Blessings to you.
Elaine, I love you more and more with every unvieling of your heart. You are so sensitive to the Lord’s prompting. You are immediate in your response to His voice. You are such an example and encouragement to me.
Praying that tonight you will experience the peaceful, sweet sleep the Lord promises in His Word. (Proverbs 3:24) May the helmet of salvation guard your thoughts even in slumber.
Love and prayers,
Joy
Precious friend, your penned confession this morning rings in agreement with a Scripture upon which I was meditating this morning … probably at the same time you were writing!
“We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.“ (2 Corinthians 10:5)
As I read though a few chapters in 2 Corinthians, I stopped short at that fifth verse in chapter 10, soaking in the active and determined will behind the words.
“take captive every thought”
– deliberately capturing every stray thought (even in a dream!) …
“to make it obedient to Christ”
– and filtering it through the fine sieve of Christ’s grace and God’s law, consciously choosing to cast aside anything that is contrary to His character and will.
Seems like you’ve done just that this morning, my friend. I know your obedience and faithfulness will be richly blessed!
Beautiful sunrise picture! And by it’s light an equally beautiful view of your heart!!
“Where morning dawns and evening fades, He calls forth songs of joy”. (Ps 65:8)
Kathleen
I’ve been dealing with some things in my own life now and reading your thoughts always helps tremendously. God does that, doesn’t he?
Elaine,
Yes, confession is good for the soul, and yes, others need to hear that there is still struggle in the Christian life. I like that your confession is general so that we can relate it to our own.
I’m struggling in this life right along side you, and we’ll continue to turn to the One who carries our struggles for us.
Matthew 11:29-30 (New International Version)
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
Such a work of the Spirit you have shared! The world tells us we should look at our dreams and use them to predict our future, or use them to guide our steps and tell us which way to go, or else simply enjoy them. Only the Spirit could have taken the flesh’s dream and used it for good…to remind you of Christ’s love and His desire for your holiness, to soften your heart in repentance, and then to bless us!
God is good!
Hope you enjoyed your run!
Thanks for the beautiful words this morning. How wonderful that God’s mercies are new every morning…and that you were there to witness them today.
I really don’t understand why some of the thorns continue to prick our sides, but I’m thankful his strength is made perfect in my weakness.
Blessings to and your preparations today.
Elaine…
You don’t know how much your heart and how you share it means to me. Ah yes the dark of night may try to keep us captive, but Jesus, our light, illuminates the darkness and cradles us home!
Much love friend,
K
Just listening. Intently.
I believe we are constantly a “work in progress.” We can’t give up and give in to our fleshly nature.
I have struggled time and again over the past year with some issues of the heart, coming to grips with the reality that I am dealing with feelings of bitterness and resentment. I keep thinking I have overcome and moved on, only to discover that those roots run deeper under the surface than I realized. Forgiveness is a choice I must make daily.
Thank God he meets me where I am and leads me to the path of righteousness. I have to choose to follow him, though. I must become pliable, allowing him to shape me down here so I will fit in up there…I’m getting there, with his grace.
Blessings to you, Elaine. Praying for sweet rest for you tonight.
Don’t you find that when God prompts you to share something that you normally wouldn’t, it strikes a cord in the hearts of those with whom you share? Sweet friend, this is certainly one of those instances for the cord has been struck in this heart.
Thank you for your transparency. There is beauty through and through.
What a blessing Elaine. Thank God for using you to reach us.
Elaine,
I awoke this morning as well as yesterday morning, in a what if situation, and I choose to listen to God. Because my dream is one thing, doesn’t mean that it is God’s.
I can’t help but reflect upon….Come, Tarry, Go.
I’m still at the come, and tarry stages of those that have particpated in the past to warrant the thoughts in my dark.
Lovingly,
Yolanda
Elaine, I know exactly what you are talking about. The thorn of flesh in my life is constant; no, not in any outward visible way to others, but in the quiet of my own heart and life, on the path I walk with the Savior.
Our thorns keep us humble, my friend. They keep us pressed into the Savior’s side. For that, we can boast about our weakness, for that is when we experience His strength.
Oh, I’m so excited to have won this CD. Thank you and I’m emailing you my snail mail address. 🙂
I am loving my Sara Groves…Hope your winners enjoy! thinking of you, my friend.
thanks for coming by…you were so sweet…i wish you lived close by…i love those pumpkin spice frappucinos!
i’ll get one tomorrow and start on my decorating!
Elaine, just to let you know, my mom told me she received the copy of Epic and is sending it on soon! Thanks, my friend!
Yes! For some of us, we cannot allow Satan even to get an inch… because we know he’ll always go for the mile. With God’s grace, each time we come up against these temptations, our response to submit our thoughts to God becomes quicker and quicker… and than easier and easier… Good to know I’m not alone…
Beautiful. Thank you for the Christmas Presence.
Elaine, I can certainly identify with you. Sometimes it seems like sinful thoughts or attitudes come right out of nowhere… Makes me think of 1 Cor. 10:12: “So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall!”
Oh, thank you! I don’t have any music by Sarah Groves, this is a true delight to my heart.
Thank you very much.
Lovingly,
Yolanda
Congratulations to the winners!:)
And thank you, Elaine, for you open, honest, humble heart. You honor God with your words and actions. What a blessing!
(((BIG HUGS!)))
God Bless,
Amy:)
wifeforthejourney:
I’m so pleased that whatever “bug” that has kept me from reaching the comment page for the last couple of weeks has passed – so here I am!
God in His mercy does both cover us with, and defend us by, His grace. Our thought life is both fertile field for the Spirit of God and battlefield for the Enemy of our souls. May we all grow in faith to embrace the strength God provides to follow where He leads us.
What you have written makes me think of the first verse of the old hymn, “Be Thou My Vision”
“Be thou my vision, O Lord of my heart; naught be all else to me, save that thou art. Thou my best thought, by day or by night, waking or sleeping, thy presence my light.”
Thanks for the morning’s encouragement; love you!
~Billy
Hey Elaine,
Thank the Lord for this post, I have had runaway dreams that have plagued me since childhood. I know that I am not completely alone. I have dreamt things that horrify me, Elaine…I know it stems from things that happened to me in the past. I know that only Christ can guard my subconscious as I sleep, and while I am awake. I pray that we would be sanctified through and through…
katiegfromtennessee
got my study done this morning and posted about it…and His Light finally lit up my insides! The TREE is UP…my DD and I put it up while Dad went to a “financial plans” meeting for college decisions next year.
So, the house is finally feeling like THE SEASON…
sidenote: please pray for us this weekend…we’ll be with 44 youth at Winter Retreat studying “One Life to Live” centering on the importance of decisions and being intentional with your actions and plans. thanks!
Hi Elaine,
Thank you so much for sharing your heart with us. Confession is certainly good for our souls…
I believe it is important for others to know that no matter how long we walk with the Lord… there are still struggles.
Thanks so much for visiting me again on my blog. I have missed you.
Lynn
Elaine,
As always thank you for your constant reminders. You keep me grounded my friend. I am struggling with something right now, but God knows what it is and he will work it out to the good. Love you!
My Dad always told me that dreams are a tool that God uses to clean out our subconscious.
Once those things come to light in my dreams I have a choice to make.
I don’t know if people remember but in the old testament when priest was to go into the holy of holies they were not allowed to sleep the night before in case they sinned in their dreams.
And although some dreams are just a conglomeration of things seen and heard…some are also evidence of what is in our heart that we are unwilling to face.
I can tell where I am in my spiritual walk by what is coming up in my dreams and how I respond to those things in my dreams.
In those dreams where my subconscious chooses to respond in a Godly way….I feel the presence of God very strongly.
Dreams are very important…I am glad you posted this.
I sometimes think dreams are one of satans greatest tools. We all have confessions within this…again, a powerful post. Thank you for stirring my heart and mind to be more pure and worthy of our Saviour.
In His Graces~Pamela