I tucked her under my arm and drew her close to my heart as I whispered,
This is enough, God. This is enough. This is real love… true love; love not based on performance or preference but loved based on personhood… on the truth that I am her mother and that fact, alone, is enough to warrant her affection.
Thank God she doesn’t wait until I get it right—until I jump through enough hoops or stroke her ego in hopes of negotiating her favor. She gives me her favor regardless. She loves me, most days in spite of me, because God has put it in heart to do so. He’s put it in the hearts of my other children as well.
I am a well-loved mother. A well-loved wife. A well-loved daughter. God has surrounded me with a select circle of connections to remind me, in part, of his unconditional love toward me. Through them, I come to better understand God’s “enough.” His enough continually spills forth on my behalf because I am his child, his created delight, his joy and his crown. Never once has he forgotten me, neglected me, forsaken or abandoned me.
God’s love isn’t based on my performance or on his personal preferences, but rather based on my personhood… on the truth that I am his child and that fact, alone, is enough to warrant his everlasting affection toward me.
God loves me because it is in heart to do so, and tonight I am grateful for his unchanging nature and all-powerful ability to keep to the task of loving me, preferring me, especially on days when it seems that the world prefers otherwise. Today, I stand on the truth of who I am in Jesus Christ.
Loved.
Chosen.
Adored.
Preferred.
Royal.
Dear.
Heiress.
Forgiven.
Beautiful.
Righteous.
Needed.
Longed for.
Bride.
This is who you are as well. The world may beg to differ, may stand in line to voice otherwise. I understand. But rather than believing them, would you be willing, even as I am willing, to cast those lies into the pit of hell where they belong and, instead, cloak ourselves with the mantle of what our King has to say in the matter? His witness is the one that counts, friends, not the testimonies of those whose “love” for us is tainted by fleshly focus and personal preferences.
We will never be able to exceed people’s expectations of us. Most days, we’ll fall quite short of what they want, but with Jesus, we find our balance. We exceed human expectation because his expectations for us aren’t based on us, but rather on his Spirit living within us. And when we walk in cooperation with his Spirit, when we understand that “greater is he that is in us than he that is in the world,” then we are able to walk above and beyond the expectations that are being leveled in our direction.
True love comes from God. Every now and again, we taste it via humanity. Most often, though, we miss is because of humanity. If we’re not careful, we’ll “live” there… settle in there, instead of settling in the place of sacred understanding. This is a dismal response to the truth of what God intends for our lives.
I want to love truly. I want to be truly loved. I want to love God’s way; I want to be loved God’s way. And while I cannot control the loving responses of others, with God’s help, I can control mine. I want my love to be enough for my children, my spouse, my friends, my world. I want them and you to be able to tuck my love in tightly and voice it as enough—as comforting, as peaceful, as certain, and as re-assuring as you need it to be.
I don’t want to base my love for you on your performance or my personal preferences; instead, I want the fact of your personhood—your “created in the image of God” status—to be the basis for my affection. I’m not fully there, but I am working on it. By God’s grace and through his Spirit, true love will become my norm rather than my exception.
It’s been a hard day to love, friends. At this point, I’m not sure how to move beyond my feelings, but I am confident of this…
I’ve got a family who loves me, and a God who loves me all the more, and it is enough to carry me through the night. The sun will rise in the morning to bring its witness to the day, and the Son will rise in my heart to bring his witness to my authenticity.
And that is enough. He is enough.
Living in his enough this night…
PS: I need your help… ASAP… I scrolled back through some of my previous older posts (from August of this year backward and am noticing that my comments are being deleted by someone). I have a suspicion it’s coming from a URL in Mountainview, California. I’m not sure this is a blogger issue or not, but if this is coming from another hacker, I’m on to you and will continue to pursue this until I get an answer. Anyone else having this issue?
Copyright © December 2009 – Elaine Olsen
Just a quick greeting from my house to yours as we enter into this week of calendared “thanks”–a practice that should follow us every day of our lives. I’ll be offline most of the week, but wanted to send you a pre-Christmas tour of my life!