Category Archives: cancer video

from where I’m sitting today {chemo #3}…

from where I’m sitting today {chemo #3}…

 {the Market House… will make sense if you watch the video}
Twenty-four points of sacred intersection between my heart and theirs—those twenty-four precious souls that God chose to weave into my morning and lunch hour. I probably missed someone in my counting, but it doesn’t much matter the number. What matters is that each one of those lives graciously allowed me a moment of their day to make a personal investment into their hearts. It is privilege I don’t take lightly… a gift given to me by them and by God as an opportunity to love and to simply say,
I notice you; you matter.
There is no pain I currently hold that negates the responsibility of such moments. Rather, God is using the pain as a catalyst to touch lives that I would have never had open access to in my previous life… my life as I lived it only ten weeks ago. I don’t want that life back. Instead, I want to hold the fullness of what I now know, now believe—
That cancer will not be my undoing; rather, cancer will be the threshold of my emerging. Something greater—God’s greater—will become of me because of the path I’m now treading. Perhaps not something in the tangible, seen aspects of daily living, but in the quiet, secret places of sacred consecration.  
I want a pure soul…  a cleanness before God I’ve never known. I want perspective and wisdom that can only come from the Father and that, sometimes, can only be birthed through suffering. I want to get to the end of treatment and not harbor any regrets for the time I now manage. I want to live my “now” rightly and honor the pulse of Christ’s heart as laid out in Matthew 28:18-20. None of us gets a pass on this one, friends. Regardless of what we’re “holding” today, no matter if it hurts us immensely and provokes our faith in the deepest kind of way, we must receive our calling from God as the most precious gift from his heart. We must treasure it, own it, believe it, live it.
Go. Make disciples. Baptizing every point of sacred intersection along the way with the truth, love, and witness of all heaven. There is no finer gift that we can offer to those fellow sojourners on the path of grace we trod. They may not understand that they’re on the path of grace, but when their steps coincide with ours, then grace abounds. It’s in me and in you; it’s ours to give. Dispense it liberally, rejoicing as you go.
I notice you; you matter.  
A word rightly and fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver (Proverbs 25:11a). So speak as you are given occasion, knowing that in those few brief moments of sacred pause, you step as God intends, you shine forth as gold, and all of heaven choruses its applause in honor of your understanding.
Keep to it, friends. As always…
Peace for the journey,

PS: For a copy of Sassy Granny’s recipe, click here…

a moment with the Gardener…

“Now the LORD God had planted a garden in the east, in Eden;” {Genesis 2:8}

“This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.” {John 15:8}

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law…. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.” {Galatians 5:22-23, 25}
Enjoy some time with the Gardener today; may his good seed find a generous and willing soil within your heart. Shalom!

Ascending to my "overlook"…

“When the men of Judah came to the place that overlooks the desert and looked toward the vast army, they saw only dead bodies lying on the ground; no one had escaped.” (2 Chronicles 20:24).
My spirit is moved today in a strong direction—a navigational pull that leads me into the midst of a story belonging to my spiritual ancestors. They are your ancestors as well, for (as believers in Jesus Christ) we are the spiritual seed of Abraham. Those long ago and faraway events tucked into ancient history and laid out for us on the pages of Scripture belong to us. They are commended to us for our good care and careful consideration. Theirs are the ancient paths (Jer. 6:16) given to us as a road map for our current walkabouts in faith.
I find strength in their witness, and today my thoughts are anchored within a Judean soil, alongside a king named Jehoshaphat, and in the midst of a people named Israel. Collectively, they faced a real threat by a real enemy in a real place during a real point and time in history. Their response to that threat has me thinking… even more so, has me doing.
1. When the enemy came knocking, they immediately took their concern to the one place, the One God who had promised them consideration along these lines:
Spoken by the king… “If calamity comes upon us, whether the sword of judgment, or plague or famine, we will stand in your presence before this temple, that bears your Name and will cry out to you in our distress, and you will hear us and save us.” (2 Chronicles 20: 9)
2. The corporate gathering of Israelites waited in anticipation of God’s Spirit to move; when He did, He lighted upon one of them and spoke this message over them:
“Listen King Jehoshaphat and all who live in Judah and Jerusalem! This is what the LORD says to you: ‘Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s. Tomorrow march down against them…. Take up your positions; stand firm and see the deliverance the LORD will give you, O Judah and Jerusalem. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Go out to face them tomorrow, and the LORD will be with you.’” (2 Chronicles 20:15, 17).
3. The Israelites received the message as their own, and when tomorrow came, they obeyed God’s directives, worshipping as they went:
“Early in the morning they left for the Desert. … As they began to sing and praise, the LORD set ambushes against the men of Ammon and Moab and Mount Seir who were invading Judah, and they were defeated. (2 Chronicles 20:20,22) 
Note that in the midst of their praise and worship and unbeknownst to them, God moved on their behalf.
4. God’s people took their position at the overlook and witnessed his faithfulness in manifold measure:
“When the men of Judah came to the place that overlooks the desert and looked toward the vast army, they saw only dead bodies lying on the ground; no one had escaped.” (2 Chronicles 20:24).
These are the makings of a good walkabout in faith, don’t you think? When the threat came…
They prayed;
They listened;
They worshipped;
They obeyed;
They took up their positions;
They witnessed the deliverance of their God.
And in the midst of all their “theys”, God was working to procure an ending in keeping with his God-ness. This is corporate, spiritual victory at its best; responses from both ends of the equation—ours’ and God’s—working together to solidify and set in concrete a heart truth. Not merely a head truth, but a truth that exponentially increases as we courageously allow it some feet and a voice so that it can make its way from the pages of a book onto the pavement of real understanding.
Theirs is a faith I want to live.

 

Accordingly, I have stood before the Lord in his temple (1 Cor. 6:16). I have listened to his directives, and I have worshipped. I am taking him at his word, and now begins my ascent to the overlook. I don’t imagine the climb will be easy. Mountain terrain always hosts its fair share of rocks, edges, misshapen branches, and pebbles that like to get wedged into the soles of our feet. Sometimes the air around us betrays us as we make that ascent, forcing the issue of our every breath. Sometimes our companions as well; not every mountain ascent is created for every mountain climber. Sometimes our journeys are meant to walk in isolation.
But of this one thing I am certain of today, for I have known it to be true in my yesterday…
When we arrive at the overlook of God’s intention, the view will be breathtaking. Why? Because our good and gracious Father has gone ahead of us to secure for us a victory that will far outweigh any difficulty required of us while making personal pilgrimage toward eternal Promise.
I am counting on the upcoming view from my overlook; in many ways, I’ve had an advance glance at it today. What a joy to know Jesus and to know that he can be trusted with my all! He just keeps multiplying his goodness and grace into my world. May you know and hold a similar understanding in your hearts this day. You are good pilgrims with which to share my journey. Thank you for spending some of your time with me. I count it a privilege. I love you each one. As always…
Peace for the journey,
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 PS: I will be MIA most of the week, but will try and check in with you as I can. Shalom.
the next page {chemotherapy}

the next page {chemotherapy}

Today I’ve turned the page in my cancer journey… a new chapter entitled Chemotherapy. There was a great deal of mystery surrounding this event; new chapters are like that. We cannot hold their fullness on the front end. To see it all, hold it all, and taste it all before that “all” arrives is to mark that chapter as previously read… as “been there done that,” no further mystery to absorb. Not so in my case. Yes, the “process” of receiving my chemotherapy is now recorded as experience. The after effects are what remain hidden. As they unfold, I will be careful to take notes and to consider their influence over me. It’s simply too much to know today. Accordingly, I will leave it for tomorrow.
Which reminds me, yet again, about my “worrying” needs and the importance of placing them within the context of single day… sometimes a single hour. God has tomorrow covered. All I need to be concerned with is how to manage the fullness of today. And so far, today has been covered magnificently by the grace of God.
God is my hero, and when his Spirit living within me connects with his Spirit living in him, the result is an unstoppable force of nature—a channel of power, strength, peace, and goodness. I love keeping pace with my King. I love when my heart rhythms with his. Today has been one of those days for me, and I am grateful for the simple joy of a single day that is ending far better than how I imagined it would end even as it began a few hours ago.
{my chemo nurse, Sarah, who is from Montana! I’m certain that God hand-picked her for me… for those of you who don’t know, I have a penchant for Montana.}
{free hats from Friends of the Cancer Center / Cape Fear Valley Hospital}
I wish I could write more… words escape me in this moment. Safe to say, thank you for ministering to me and my family as you do. You are the fingerprints of God all over my heart. I count it a privilege to walk alongside you in this season. As always…
Peace for the journey
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