Category Archives: trust

Walking Our Assignment…

“See to it that no one misses the grace of God…” (Hebrews 12:15).

 

This morning, Spurgeon has me thinking about the Israelites’ tribal progression through the wilderness and how this relates to my own progression through mine.

I’m pretty sure I have some “Judahite” blood running through my veins. They were the leaders in the journey; in charge and in front … those given the privilege of a “first glimpse” of the road ahead without the worry of what’s been left behind. Visionary walking suits me. I like being the one trusted with the unfolding of a promise.

I think, perhaps, I have some “Levite” blood coursing through my veins. They found their place throughout the progression. Some in front, carrying the Ark of the Covenant, some in the middle of the pack, charged with the task of carrying the tabernacle and its furnishings. Regardless of their position, their responsibility was all things “worship-related”. “Set-apart” and consecrated walking is also a good fit for me. I like being the one trusted with the sacred things of God.

But the Danites? Those at the rear and trusted with the responsibility of clean up … a final look-over for the “left-behinds”? The last to set up camp and the last to see God’s “up ahead”? Well, I don’t think I’d choose it, but then again, I don’t imagine the choosing is up for grabs.

Some days we lead; some days we clean-up. There is merit and purpose in both positions. We don’t always see it this way. What we see is our position in relation to those around us. We are tempted to measure our “holy” worth by what our brothers and sisters are doing, forgetting all the while that the role we’ve been given is vital and necessary as it pertains to us corporately walking through to God’s land of promise.

God doesn’t intend for our journey of grace to walk in isolation. He means for us to step it in unison as his holy tribe, set apart for his consecration and en route to a completed end. To get there, we must be willing to walk our assigned positions with the understanding that God has ordered our steps and that he is faithful to make each one of them count for kingdom gain.

The trouble comes when we begin to think that we could “order” better … that somehow our wisdom exceeds God’s. Instead of seeing the worth in the place we’ve been assigned, we jockey ourselves for a front position, giving little credence and credibility to our seasons of “in the middle” or “at the back”.

Do you ever wonder if God grows weary with our assessment regarding his assignment for our lives? I’m certain I’ve nearly exasperated his patience along the way … times when I’ve frantically pushed my way “from the back” to try and make a place for myself “at the front”. Some days, I nearly exhaust myself from the spiritual gymnastics of trying to land myself in the place of my choosing.

What a waste of time.

I think we diminish God’s kingdom purpose when we allow ourselves the freedom to roam between camps, squandering time and expending energy on things that aren’t intended for our consideration. In doing so, we delay the process of our holy progression. How much better would it be to pitch our tents in the place of God’s intention and get busy with the assignments lying within our borders rather than reaching for a task never intended for our hands?

For the Danites, that assignment measured out differently than that of the Judahites and the Levites, yet all were equal in worth as it pertained to their moving on with God. All assignments were given with the end result in mind—getting to the Promised Land in tact and with the consecrated faith that comes from walking in corporate trust with God and his people rather than stepping in selfish isolation.

This is our wilderness pilgrimage, friends. Right here; right now. The life we live between two points—our birth and our burial—is the march of faith entrusted to our wandering hearts. This is our desert assignment. Life on earth is but our bridge to the life we will live in the full promise and truth of God’s forever.

Getting there isn’t an easy walk. It means pitching our tents in the place of God’s choosing and making it home until he loosens the pegs and pushes us onward. It means taking our rightful place within his ordered understanding and relinquishing our thoughts about how we could do it better. It means viewing our progression from different vantage points and being incredibly thankful with the fact we’ve been given the eyes to vision God’s promise in any measure, regardless of our positions.

It means keeping to the truth of kingdom perspective and making sure that no one, no single person placed within our allowable reach, misses the grace of God and, therefore, misses the march of freedom.

Perhaps this is the worth of walking with some Danite bloodlines, the beauty of standing “at the back” and with a fuller picture in view. They were the clean-up crew. When the Judahites and the other-“ites” missed a few stragglers—those who were forgotten and mistakenly looked-over in the chaos and confusion of moving ahead—the Danites were charged with their inclusion. With making sure that the “left-behinds” had the opportunity to walk the road of Promise.

I don’t know your position this day. Some of you are in the lead; some are muddled down in the middle, and some of you are hunkered down at the rear. Some of you don’t like your position. I understand. I’ve harbored similar feelings in seasons past; I imagine it won’t be the last time I find my discontent regarding my assigned position. Regardless of our place in the line-up of grace’s procession, we are all charged with its dispensation. With making sure that no one misses out on God’s journey of promise.

And when we take hold of that understanding, that we all are entrusted with a great grace from a great God to be a great influencer regarding a great kingdom, then any position we’ve been assigned becomes holy ground, consecrated and set apart for a great purpose.

It’s a great day to be a kingdom walker and to share this desert wandering with you, my friends. This week, I’m standing with the Danites as part of the clean-up crew … maybe even for the next season of my life. Where have you been called to stand this day? Don’t worry. If you feel left behind in the “push” forward, I’ve got you covered. So does God. You won’t be left behind. This is the beauty of our corporate walk together.

As always, my prayer and hope is for you to know your God more fully in this moment because of your spending some time with me at “peace for the journey”. We serve the only God who can be known. The more we press into his truth, the greater our understanding about who he IS.

Think on him this day, and be thankful for your position within the march to freedom … to Promise. I love you each one.

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PS: If you would like to study further regarding the Israelites’ march to Promise, Numbers 2 is a good place to start.

Paz para el viaje (peace for the journey)…

Paz para el viaje (peace for the journey)…

Hey Blogland! Instead of getting Elaine’s daily dose of “Peace for the Journey,” I’m afraid today’s entry comes from her 20-year-old son, Nick. I know, I know…in no way can I match my mom’s conciseness, clarity, and writing panache, but I’ll give it my best shot (And I won’t hold it against you if you stop reading now and check out someone else’s blog…)

I recently returned from a 10-day mission trip to the South American nation of Bolivia. Twelve of us went through an organization named Curamericas and were led by a bilingual 22-year-old volunteer named Andrew Herrera. A majority of our time in Bolivia was spent in the village of Tacachia, nestled cozily in the Andes Mountains about 35 miles from the capital city of La Paz. We worked at the Kory Wawanaca Children’s Home, an orphanage with 18 children and several staff members. I had the unique privilege of having this be a “return” trip to Bolivia, as I went last year with a group from our church.


Our team of twelve set out on a Tuesday at 3 p.m. with plans calling for us to arrive in La Paz the next day at 6:00 a.m. It seems that nothing ever goes according to plan, though. We missed a connection flight in Miami and then had to change our plans on the fly in Miami. As an occasionally hotheaded 20-year-old, I grew frustrated and impatient very quickly, and worried a lot about our new travel plans. Long story short, we did some South American globetrotting the next day and went through Venezuela, Peru, and finally reached La Paz at 12:45 a.m. on Thursday morning after 35 straight hours of travel (that’s the southern tip of the U.S., the northern tip of South America, the western tip of South America, and the highest capital city in the world for those of you keeping track…not too bad, eh?).

Already God had taught me a basic lesson in Christian living: I had to trust Him, and realize that everything was in His hands.

Exodus 33: 12-18
Moses said to the Lord, “You have been telling me, ‘Lead these people,’ but you have not let me know whom you will send with me. You have said, ‘I know you by name and you have found favor with me.’ If you are pleased with me, teach me your ways so I may know you and continue to find favor with you. Remember that this nation is your people.
The Lord replied, “My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”
Then Moses said to him, “If your presence does not go with us, do not send us up from here. How will anyone know that you are pleased with me and with your people unless you go with us? What else will distinguish me and your people from all the other people on the face of the earth?”

And the Lord said to Moses, “I will do the very thing you have asked, because I am pleased with you and I know you by name.”
Then Moses said, “Now show me your glory.”
 


In the days leading up to our trip, this passage from Exodus was a daily prayer and inspiration for me. Countless times during our trip, it would come to mind as a source of comfort. I always ended my prayers by echoing Moses, “Now show me your glory.”

There were two definitive moments when I witnessed the glory of God in Tacachia—two “passing-by” moments. Sure, the entire experience was glorious, but two were the kind of glory that I’m sure Moses witnessed there on Sinai with the Lord. These two have seared themselves into my memory and will not soon be forgotten.

The first came during a Sunday lunch at the orphanage. 10-year-old Roy, who was an avid chess player, had brought his set out and was looking for an American to play against. He had already done battle with Frank Ferrell, an adult on our team, earlier in the week; Frank had been victorious, but not without some difficulty. By the grace of God, I knew enough Spanish to help set up the first contest between the two; neither was very knowledgeable of the other’s language.

I was able to then witness the rematch on Sunday, sitting next to Roy and being able to translate somewhat for both parties. The match was a tight and silent one, with both players extremely focused on the task at hand. With a pair of brilliant moves, however, Roy was able to checkmate Frank and claim victory. Here were two people (completely polar opposities) from different age groups, neither speaking the other’s language who were bound only by a common knowledge and love for the game. Sensing Roy’s excitement, I leaned over to Frank and said, “tell him ‘buen hecho’” (Good job, well done…). Frank tapped Roy, who was walking away, on the shoulder and said, “Roy…Buen hecho.”

And as he walked away, the grin that exploded across Roy’s face was, without a doubt, the most vivid and radiant smile I have ever seen.

The second “passing-by” moment came at our departure from the orphanage, a morning that was one of the most difficult mornings I have ever experienced. My week of getting to know the 18 kids at the orphanage was over; I bonded with all of them, but to a higher degree with some. I enjoyed a special bond with 13-year-old Miguel, in part because I saw so much of myself in him. He, like me, was the oldest of four siblings, had an avid interest in athletics, and a penchant for sarcasm at times. We talked one night about how much I enjoyed being at the orphanage and getting to know Miguel and his family. The most enduring image I will take from Tacachia, and the one that tells me that God worked through us in this trip occurred during our tearful goodbyes (there were some tears, and some floods).

My last goodbyes were Miguel and Roy, who were standing around the monkeybars. I told them I really enjoyed meeting them and would miss them. Roy asked if I was going to return with such a pleading look on his face, and I said I hoped that I would. Miguel was silent as his and Roy’s eyes began to fill with tears. I looked in Miguel’s eyes and said, “Somos hermanos. Dios te bendiga” (We are brothers. God bless you.). We got in the cars and pulled out, but not without me taking one last glance at Miguel and Roy, still standing next to the monkeybars with their heads down; spasms of heartache at telling these kids goodbye have bothered me ever since.

For the days leading up to and during the trip I, like Moses, had been pleading with God in my prayers, “If your presence does not go with us, do not send us up from here. How will anyone know that you are pleased with me and with your people unless you go with us? What else will distinguish me and your people from all the other people on the face of the earth?”
Only the presence of God can bring out those two images. Only the presence of God can help one overcome language and altitude and attitude barriers to serve Him. Only with the presence of God can we, like Moses, witness the glory of God.
I truly feel at home in Tacachia, and hope to return there again next year to further strengthen the bonds I’ve formed this year, as well as to cultivate new ones. This trip, as is most often the case, stands as proof that yes, God worked THROUGH me. But he worked so much more IN me, and for that I am eternally grateful.
In the days since returning from the orphanage, Relient K’s song “I’m Taking You with Me” has been running through my head. My heartfelt pledge since returning to the United States is found in these lyrics:
“If home is where the heart is then my home is where you are;
But it’s getting oh so hard to spend these days without my heart.
So I’m taking you with me anywhere that I
Could ever wanna be for the rest of my life.
I want you there with me, and If there ever comes a time
When I should have to leave, I hope you know that I,
I’m taking you with me.”

So may you, blog readers, go with the presence of God, may you witness His glory, and may you take Him with you wherever you go.
Paz para el viaje (peace for the journey)
~ Nick
Down the Road

Down the Road

“‘I am the way… ’” (John 14:6).


I had a thought during my devotional time this morning. A quick word for some good friends who, perhaps like me, need a reminder about our “down the road’s.”

We are prone to them, are we not? To our looking down the road, planning our down the road, worrying about our down the road, all the while missing out on the present moments given to us by a gracious God who offers them for our reverent celebration.

We forego the pleasure and peace of a current moment because we allow the heaviness of a down the road future to claim our thoughts, and therefore, shackle our capacity to live in the simplicity of a single pause.

This one. Not in the ones to come somewhere, sometime down the road, but the moment we hold in our hands right now. Do we have enough faith for this kind of living? A faith that is content to live gradually rather than having to see the end before it arrives? How different would our journeys walk if we could take hold of this one truth and embed it into our way of “doing” life?

Not that we don’t plan and prepare with our futures in mind, but rather that we engage each new step with the understanding that our Jesus is our down the road Companion. He goes before us, he comes behind us. He walks beside us. He lives within us. We cannot help but be surrounded by his matchless and unfathomable grace as we go.

We can refuse it. We can close our eyes to his abiding and ever-present comfort and go it alone, trusting in our own feeble attempts at having life make sense. But in doing so, we miss the momentary peace that enables us to live worry-free and in complete trust of a future we cannot see.

I know. My heart writes from a place of understanding. My down the road’s have been all-consuming as of late, denying me the privilege of a moment by moment, peaceful rest.

I can live in a moment, friends. I’m not sure I can handle the holy “rest of them” in a single breath, but I have a down the road Jesus who can. He stands before me this day and asks for my trust. For my complete gaze on his willing sacrifice that enables me to live in a moment and then to move on to the next.

When I place the cross before me, it blocks my vision from the unfolding of events that lie ahead of me. It covers them all and shadows me with a sacred perspective that shouts victory and triumph at every turn.

Jesus is the Way. He is our down the road. He is the pleasure and Peace of our every moment. Live in those moments this day, and let Jesus be your more than enough to see you through to tomorrow. As always,

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PS: One of the pleasures of “momentary” living is embracing the pauses that come to us as we journey down the road. I had one such pleasure last evening in meeting “face to face” another blogging friend, Katie G from Tennessee. I invite you to partake of our moments together via this youtube link. In addition, please keep Katie and her husband, Luke, in your prayers as they are expecting their first child and have some concerns along those lines.

A Fine Child

“Now a man of the house of Levi married a Levite woman, and she became pregnant and gave birth to a son. When she saw that he was a fine child, she hid him for three months. But when she could hide him no longer, she got a papyrus basket for him and coated it with tar and pitch. Then she placed the child in it and put it among the reeds along the bank of the Nile. His sister stood at a distance to see what would happen to him.” (Exodus 2:1-4).

The Nile is a difficult “letting go.” A hard release. A gut-wrenching surrender.

It was for Moses’ parents. It is for me.

Tonight I stand on the riverbank of the Nile and watch my son from a distance as he boards a plane at Raleigh-Durham International Airport, heading toward the mountainous regions of Bolivia. He will spend ten days at an orphanage, tilling the land, repairing the chicken coops, working on latrines, and playing a pick-up game of soccer on every occasion.

He will bathe little; sleep even less. Stomach Bolivian delicacies and try his best to speak the language he’s been intensely studying as his college minor. He’ll make me proud, of that I am sure. Others will love him, of that I am more certain.

And while all of this makes my heart smile with gratitude for the man he is becoming, there is a pang of sadness for me. Not because I desire to keep Nick to myself, but rather because I won’t be alongside to watch the unfolding of this “fine child” before the eyes of others. Moments and memories that I’d like to scrapbook for myself will be given as a remembrance to those who stand further down the river’s bank, eagerly awaiting his arrival and anticipating his participation in their lives.

I see the bigger picture; it’s been growing in me for a long season. God has amply supplied me with a series of “letting go’s” that continue to shape my heart for sacred surrender. They always make me cry, and I’ve never shied away from their wet. I simply allow the tears a spacious place to land in order to water the growth of my tender soil … my fragile soul. I pray them not to be too much, but rather just enough to seed my pain with some purpose.

It’s a good prayer to pray, especially because our “letting go’s” are going to arrive. It is the way of a forward journey, regardless of our willingness to stand still and not move one moment beyond this one. How much better would it be to allow our moments of “needful release” to birth in us a sacred shaping that will serve a better end—both ours and God’s.

Moses’ parents understood this better than most. They were commended for their faithful release and duly memorialized for it in the Hebrews “hall of faith”:

“By faith Moses’ parents hid him for three months after he was born, because they saw that he was not an ordinary child, and they were not afraid of the king’s edict.” (Hebrews 11:23).

By faith, they hid their son. By faith, they released their son. By faith, they watched their son from a distance. By faith, they understood that their son was no ordinary child, but rather a “fine child” destined for a better end than that of most of his contemporaries.

By faith, we should equally trust our Father with the release of our children to the River Nile.

They’re all “fine.” Special and beautiful and worthy of the nod of heaven. Like Moses’ parents, from the moment they’re born, we hide them. Shelter them beneath our wings because we understand that while heaven has marked them with eternity, hell has marked them otherwise. For destruction—as ordinary, expendable, unremarkable, and worthy of the nothing more than a swift slaughter simply because they carry the bloodlines of a King.

But three months passes quickly. Eighteen years for most of us. For a few of us, a painful and difficult less. For a few of us, a painful and struggling more. Still and yet, there comes for all of us a moment at the river’s edge. A time of release when we must find our peace at a distance and trust that Father God has something bigger and something beyond us that awaits our children on the other side of our hard surrender.

We may not see his wisdom in it all; rarely do we catch a full glimpse of our children’s forever. But occasionally we have an inkling—a heavenly whisper reminding us that, indeed, there is a wisdom that exceeds understanding. A “more” that is coming because of our willingness to “let go” and “let God.”

Tonight, I “let go” again of the son I dearly love. It won’t be the last time my heart is called upon to make such a surrender. But I do so in the spirit and strength of my spiritual ancestors who better understood the painful trust of a difficult release. Thus, I speak these words of release to my Nick as he flies the night sky and as I try to find him there, amidst the stars and dark that separates our flesh…

Go with God this night, my son. Sail the Nile with all the trust of heaven to guide you, shape you, strengthen you, and mold you into the man that God has intended for you to be. I will be keeping watch, but my arms aren’t long enough to catch you this time. God has orchestrated events accordingly. He means for me to stand on the riverbank while you engage with the wild and wet of a river that calls for your participation. You are a fine child, and you were meant for more than my arms. You were meant for the world. Embrace it, and it will embrace you. It’s time that others discover the wealth of who you are.

And just in case they don’t, if for some reason they reach any other conclusion, you can be certain that I’ll be waiting at the river’s edge to welcome you home and to remind you of just how extraordinary you truly are. I love you, Nick. I’ll see you on the other side of your river’s ride.

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On Graduation…

I’ve heard it said before that “this life is but a dress rehearsal for the next.” If that’s true (and I happen to think there to be some merit in this understanding), then we are best served by paying closer attention to the scene changes in our lives … to the crescendoing moments that warrant an audience’s notice and applause therein.

When the shifting of a season takes center stage, God offers our hearts an invitation for reflection. We can either refuse its pause, or we can bow our souls to the moment to consider its worth as it pertains to the grander epic being played out in creation. If our “now” resembles in part our “next,” then there is value in the momentary pauses that fill our lives. Through them we hear the eternal whispers and glimpse the grander glories that await us on the other side of a long and, sometimes, fragmented obedience.

Center stage moments are God’s gift to us. I’ve authored a few of my own in the course of my forty-three years on this earth. More than these, I’ve sat ringside to the moments of those whom I love the most. This weekend holds one of those pauses for me. My son will graduate from high school.

I’ve walked this road before, thus granting me the benefit of hindsight. This one doesn’t sting as profoundly as the first one did. Not because this one is less important, less special, or any less embraced, but rather because familiarity removes some of the mystery of it all. I can better enjoy this milestone because the pain behind the first one wounded me deep enough to teach me … to shape and to modify my heart’s approach to the process.

There is worth in this moment. There was worth back then. But back then, I couldn’t see it. All I could do was muster enough strength to get through it. This weekend, I will have the privilege of soaking things in rather than soaking up my tears. Thus, I choose the pondering of a high school graduation and its merit as it pertains to the bigger picture. What is it about “turning the tassel” that speaks of a heavenly tomorrow?

Here’s what I think…

Graduations are launch pads. Behind them? Lots of time logged into the classroom of programmed learning. Ahead them? Lots of time logged into the classroom of experiential learning. One is the necessary predecessor of the other if the “other” is to walk easier—more truthful and more peaceful. Without the benefit of a preceding knowledge, our launching resembles a premature push from the nest that often ends with an unnecessary wounding. Sometimes the wounding is fatal, but more often than not, it leaves us with a limp that slows the process of our becoming.

There is a time to every season in our lives. This is my son’s graduating season. He stands on the launch pad of an incredible “next.” He’s ready to fly, and I’m ready to push, knowing that his wings have been fortified with eighteen years worth of feeding that have prepared him for the highs and the lows of the winds that are certain to follow.

He harbors just enough courage to take this step; I harbor just enough grace to let him do so. And between the two of us and our “just enough’s”, God is faithful to come alongside and offer his portion of “more than enough” to see us through this moment and to move us further into the promises of a better tomorrow.

There is coming a moment for each one of us … a graduation of sorts … that will launch us from the safety of our nests into the mystery of winged flight. The time we’ve logged into our earthly classrooms, coupled with the learning therein, will be the lynchpin to secure our safe passage. Some will launch prematurely, unable and ill-prepared to face the frontier of God’s forever. Some will launch at just the right time, with just enough courage and more than enough grace to land them safely into the arms of a waiting Father.

Either way, all will be required to make that step; thus, what you’re doing right now holds value for what you’ll be doing in God’s next. You may not think that this day’s unfolding matters for much of anything. You may think it matters little. But I think it all matters to God. Every scene of our lives—every mile we walk, every test we take, every prerequisite laid out for us in the curriculum of a heart’s shaping—is significant and necessary as it pertains to the turning of a final tassel when we stand before our Creator.

In that moment, God won’t be looking at the long list of credits that we drag behind us. Degrees and promotions and the applause of man aren’t enough to launch us toward eternal flight. No, what our God will be looking at is the heart that supersedes our fleshly gains. Did it beat for him? Did it walk for him? Did it love for him? Did it die for him? Does it, in any way, look like him?

That is the criteria for our graduation, friends. If we pass that test, then the tassel will turn, the diploma will be given, and the sacred commendation of our Savior will speak a final blessing of truth over our life’s journey…

“Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness.” (Matthew 25:21).

If “this life is but a dress rehearsal for our next,” then there is much to be learned via a high school graduation. I will be paying attention to the details this weekend. God is ever speaking. How I pray for a heart to be ever learning. Thus, I pray…

Keep me as a student in your classroom, Father, all the days of my life. Keep my heart in a posture that is willing to receive your instructions as vital and necessary for the road ahead. Forgive me for thinking that I “know it all”; forgive when I make excuses for “knowing too little.” Teach me just exactly what I need to know, and then fully grant me the courage and grace to walk in that knowing until I get home to you and receive my final graduation. Amen.

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