As I rounded the corner of mile two on my usual jogging route, I noticed them walking toward me—two middle-school boys getting off the bus… two brothers making their way to the home less than a quarter of a mile from the bus drop. I’ve seen them before; even chatted with them on occasion, but all I received from them in that moment was their cursory nod as they made their approach. It was obvious to me the debate going on between them. I noticed the increasing, accelerated paces that accompanied their “out of the corner of the eye” glances toward one another. A race was about to happen, but not before they passed my observation.
I must have served as their starting line, because as soon as they made it beyond my right shoulder, the competition was on. I don’t know who won the race; the older brother is bigger with a longer stride, but the younger is thinner and perhaps harbors just enough determination to claim victory over his older brother every now and again. I chuckled as they passed, having seen this kind of competitive spirit in my own sons over the years. It has both annoyed me and blessed me, always reminding me of the subtle differences that seem to exist between boys and girls.
I continued with my jog for another mile and with the “chewing” on these differences when a thought occurred to me. A voice really. A whisper that simply and profoundly declared…
Let the boy run, Elaine. Let the boy run.
If there is one thing this woman knows, it’s boys. I live with four of them—one manly boy, two semi-manly boys, and one wishing he were anywhere within shooting range of the older three! There’s just something in them that says “get to the finish line first.” Whether it’s a foot race to the front door, a sprint to claim the front seat of the van, a drive to the hoop, the front runner for the hot shower or for morning pancakes, boys have it in them to be first. When it comes to racing, all other considerations are pushed aside. My boys can’t seem to help themselves. They simply were made for the running.
Let the boy run, Elaine. Let the boy run.
I’ve thought a lot about this whisper over the past couple of days since it first entered into my heart. Thought a lot about all of the ways I’ve tried to squelch the “run” in my boys over the years. As a single mom of two young sons, it was easy for me to justify my taking the lead in all of our matters. When they wanted to run in those younger days, it bothered me. I didn’t understand boys back then; I just tried to control them for fear that I would lose them. Since Billy’s coming into my life, I better understand the nature of the manly “run”; he’s brought depth and insight into the equation. Still and yet, there’s a part of me that cannot fully appreciate the pace of a boy’s heart—the boy’s drive to be first, be strong, be in the lead, be in charge. So much of what they’re wired to be is how I’m wired as well. Thus, the rub. Thus the need for a whisper from time to time reminding me to…
Let the boy run.
I want my boys to run, all of them. I want them to be fully man and fully alive to the paces of their genetic and spiritual predisposition. I don’t want them to wait to run until they’ve passed my shoulder and I can no longer enjoy the display of their manly fortitude. I want them to run in front of me while I can yet witness their strength. I want to see them grow and become and develop into the strong leaders that God has called them to be. I don’t want them to be hindered by my need to be in control; rather, I want them to run past me, all the while because of me and my willingness to tie up their laces, to walk them to the starting line, and then to cheer them onto victory. At my age and in this season of life, I might be running alongside them; not to beat them this time around, but rather to enjoy them and to champion them into doing what they were always meant to do.
To run.
It’s not been an easy conclusion to arrive at; my parents raised me to be a strong, independent woman, unafraid of her shadow and not easily swayed by man’s opinion. I am thankful for the sturdy sense of identity that was embedded into me long before I knew what it was to share a home with a boy, much less four of them. But after years of living with their witness, they’re growing on me, and I am beginning to appreciate their innate need for speed and for the lead.
Let the boy run, Elaine. Let the boy run.
By God’s grace, I hope to follow through on this whisper of heaven. Something tells me I might need the strength of my four boys in the days to come… might need their courage and their pace to buoy me along in my journey toward home. I’m glad I have them. As I grow older, I become less tolerant of my need to be in charge and more willing to concede my front-runner status to those whose legs are better able to handle the pace of life. It’s taken me a long season to get there, and I imagine that I will always prefer my running shoes to high heels. But for now, I’m enjoying the sprint to manhood that is taking place under my roof. It makes me glad to be a woman… to know the differences that exist between me and my four boys and to be perfectly content with the distinction.
And so I say to you, my four boys—Billy, Nick, Colton, and Jadon—
Run boys. Run swiftly and let this wife and mother take it all in. I look forward to watching the race in the days to come and to cheering you on to victory. Home is just around the bend, less than a quarter of a mile from this moment, and the pace you now keep will be worth the company you will then keep for all of eternity.
Let the boy in you run strong. Let the man in you finish well.
This woman loves you and delights in living this life with you. May you now and forever always know…
Peace for the journey,
Copyright © June 2010 – Elaine Olsen
Boy, you sure know how to get the waterworks going for me! What a wonderful post.
I know that two of my three are running…I believe with the third one, though, the message I keep hearing is "GET that boy to run, Beth, GET that boy to run!" 😉
Of course, your post reminds me of two verses (emphasis mine):
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. (Hebrews 12:1)
I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. (2 Timothy 4:7)
In light of what those say, who are we to hold 'em back? 🙂
Miss you lots…sending big HUGS your way!
While it is girls (2 daughters and 2 grand daughters), I have all around me and one man; I can still relate to this so well Elaine.
For you it was "let the boys run" for me the voice so long ago that remains is "let the girls grow and go". Oh how hard that was/is but necessary in the natural and spiritual.
I needed the reminder of your powerful sharing. I'm in a natural/spiritual place right now myself in GOD of another lesson I shared today.
I love you Elaine. Beautiful photo! More importantly beautiful HEARTS!
I emailed you about something private also.
what a great word about one of my
favorite subjects, boys. i can tell
you appreciate yours as much a i
do mine.
gotta let 'em run, for sure!
Well, THAT one is a heart-tugger!!! We had only girls, so I never really understood boys. Missy and Karri often laughed at me as I panicked over their boys doing boy things…climbing, jumping and such. I was certainly the worrier. BUt I also recall standing in the living room with the baby Dusty in my arms, dancing him around the room…his chubby face yielding to the grin my antics evoked. And Gavin giggling and climbing and jumping from high places. They still bring a smile, just as our girls and our granddaughters have. Ah…such sweet moments!
This was a tear jerker, yep let the boy run, hugs my friend, Barbara
Wonderful, tear-jerking one, Elaine!! I reminisced about raising my son Chris and breathed those prayerful words over him as I read your post!
Thank you for your powerful sharing!!
Sweet Blessings!
Jackie
I loved reading this! I can so relate. My first family was three girls and then a boy….our second 'batch' is three boys and then a little girl…what a difference! Maybe it also has to do with my age!
I did not want to hear this, Elaine! lol! Now that all my daughters have left the next I have my one and only son left and it gonna be hard to let him run. But in my heart I know you are right. sniff, sniff
Beautiful post. As the mom of a growing runner, I needed this reminder. thanks friend!
Happy monday!
By the way, you run? I am so in awe of you. I know I need to, but just reading the word makes me plum tired. 🙂
A great post!! I have 4 grandsons, all still young but someday…..
And I so admire that you jog!! I can't even get up enough ummm…gumption to even walk!! :o)
I saw your comment on Renee Swope's post and I just wanted to stop by and let you know I will lift you up in prayer tonight as you prepare to move. I know how stressful that is…
Your post is beautiful, by the way. What a gifted writer you are.
Blessings,
Sandy
What a great word for moms of sons — and all moms really. Letting our children do the things God created them to do…
Would sure appreciate your prayers. Things are pretty overwhelming at our house right now with Don's mom very ill again — and Don in his most demandng month of the year & me in our last weeks of wedding prep. God will see us through, though. He blessed today with nothing short of a miracle — but even more are needed for his mom, bless her heart…
I know things are crazy for you right now, too, with the move coming up. Hang in there! Sending a hug!
As a mom of three sons, I can totally relate to your words…and this part…"Let the boy in you run strong. Let the man in you finish well."…really touched my heart….
"Home is around the bend!!!"
Run!
Well done……..
So said the Father!
Choosing JOY, Stephanie
"Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air." From 1 Corinthians 9
What an honorable post, Elaine.
I have so little to add to what's already been said, other than to mention how well you've expressed the depths of a mother's heart. No wonder we're all looking for our Kleenex!
Why is it when we're inundated with challenges, more challenges descend alongside them? I've come to the conclusion that God must trust the challenge-bearer far more than is known to them (or us), just as He trusted Job to walk out his own challenges on the highest ground – – regardless of what it looked or felt like to him or his "helpful" friends.
Run on, dear friend. Run on!
As a mom of two boys and woman who loves her man, I so get this. I want them to run with all their heart towards the dreams and plans God has for them. My man and 15yr old are doing just that this weekend…running a half marathon together and then JJ is going to keep going and run the full marathon alone. I am so proud of them!!
Thank you for your note on my blog that let me know I am not alone. I am praying for you as you pack up and move. I know it must be so hard but as you have talked about before, you hold the flowers and let Him carry your suitcase. May He guide you and guard you in His peace each step of the way.
Love you friend,
Renee
What a beautiful post! Yes, God built them to run…and they will run. What a blessing it is to watch and to know that their savior is running right along beside them.
Living for Him, Joan
Need my box of kleenex, girlfriend! Again. You seem to know just what my heart needs to hear. I totally get it.
Love you!
Susan
Being a mom of twin boys age 14, I have found my journey with them has a made a turn…although I think I am still at the curve trying to figure out where I fit in right now. So your words were wonderful to my heart and now maybe I will get around the curve and take totol delight in letting them run and know they are loved.
You most certainly are a family lady. How delightful to see your love for your dear ones in your posts.
I treasure those whispers from Heaven. They indeed give peace for the journey.
Shalom!
I love this! Especially this quote: "I might be running alongside them; not to beat them this time around, but rather to enjoy them and to champion them into doing what they were always meant to do."
Very convicting and something I'll be chewing on. Thanks always, Elaine. (I'm heading backwards to catch up on your recent posts!)
Jennifer
Elaine,
This one blessed me…more than a thousand words. Some years ago, the Lord showed me that I was actually running the race of my brothers…I had actually taken their place…and was beating them alright. But…it was not alright with God. God allowed me to seek repentance and redemption. Now…I am happy to run the race that is mine..to win and to keep. The race of a daughter of Zion!
You are running well…and the best chairleader anyone could dream to have. A blessed post indeed. Thank you, my friend!
Gladwell
Fear, for me, is what makes me want to hold so tightly to their hands and keep them from running–that and concussions, stitches, staples, broken elbows, etc.
Yet what I have learned through all these rather minor injuries is that God protected them through those "runs," and my allowing them to "run" or play football or jump on a trampoline or fall out of a chair (not sure about that one), and His protection is what reminds me to let go of those hands sometimes.
Knowing when to do so is the hard part.
Wonderful post.
Humble great word! Boys are wild and something about it feels passionate and right!
Elaine- how can i add anything to what has already been said? this was so amazing! You just certainly know how to let God get your pen to writing don't you!!!
Hey, you! Just checking in to see what's new in your world. This is a good one for me. I have a bit of trouble with that letting go thing (you may have figured that out).
It's been a crazy coupla weeks, but you have been on my mind. I linked to your book over at HighCalling today. Hope it sends more folks on that peaceful journey!
I love you, Faith Elaine!
I remember when my son would run when he was little. Sometimes his feet would slip…he'd fall…scrape a knee…I'd want to scold him for running…longing to protect him from the fall. Yet, safe isn't secure. Walking brings it's own risks. Risks of living a life so controlled that you never experience the Spirit's wind in your hair as you run fully abandoned to Him.
As the years have passed, I've seen the value of the run, and now I cheer the loudest. This Fall he'll run in a new direction, but yes…I will let the boy run.
Thanks Elaine. Love ya,
Joy